* all along the month of april *

dearie..we have reached the fourth month of the eyar..
my..how time flies..
as i looked back over the past few weeks, i decided to just type what i went through in the month of april..nothing fancy..

first week of april started off with me submitting my thesis to my supervisor..i didnt expect much but the thought of it being a subject by itself freaks the living crap out of me..4 solid credit hours to claim..and i have just collected my result for my first draft..it was bad at all..in fact, much higher than i expected but the fact of other of my classmates did so much better than me, and the fact that i am one of the lowest among the group hurts me ego big time..and i know there is nothing more i can do about it..so much of being on time, ahead of time and so much of getting infos from my supervisors did not really paid off well for me as compared to my other classmates..and really, it is a big comparison i will say..i am happy for them but not for myself..i wished i would share their bundle of joy too..

we celebrated easter in KZ last sunday and kvlye did the lesson..he went beyond my expectations and i was really very proud of him..seeing him on stage and doing what most people cannot do really impresses me much..and the dance..my team was awesome..all glory to Him..

kvlye has been going outstation quite frequently this month and this month itself up till today, its already 4 times and to me, it is more than the previous times..he travels alne most of the times and im worry sick everytime he has to go alone and mind you, its really far..talk about kl to penang and stuffs like that..with him going outstation so much, the time he has for me are affected..we have to sacrifice our time together to give way to his work and i ended up being not so happy about it and because of that, we argued and quarrelled quite alot too..but we're ok now..he is off to johor today and im missing him..

i've managed to kill those belly fats of mine..i dont know how i do it but i did it..i can again wear my shorts that i once cannot fit into..

and i have been shopping online like crazy for the past few weeks..so much of the economic turmoil, eh?

being dating kvlye every friday night..after his work, we will head off for dinner in some nice restaurant then we will go for a movie and then late night dessert before we go home..he is making up to me the times in which he have to go outstation..he is making efforts and im happy..we went to marche last friday..verdict, bad..haha..dont know about you but we hated it big time..

also, i have been skipping whole lots of classes in uni..i have my own reasons of not going..and i refuse to explain why in my blog..you can ask me personally if you wish to know why..and im sure, some of you already knew..haha..

i did sent my resume out looking for jobs only to get rejected..the immense pressure of having to secure myself with a job before i graduate really makes me want to stab myself with a knife..news about my friends who did not manage to secure a job for themselves isnt helping very much..as a result, i lost the motivation to even hunt for a job..and im very sure that i will not end up with a pr job..prolly gonna go for teaching..and hey, dont say that i cannot teach..i can, ok?enough of people coming to me and say, "christine, are you sure? you can or not one?later your student all die how?what is you start cursing and swearing in front of your students then how"..how sure are you that i will do such a thing? have i done so during my FORMAL presentation?hello...........answer me....
when i say i can, means i can..i detest being insulted and humiliated in such way..how can one judge when i didnt even try yet?
talk about killing the students..how many have i killed so far from teaching?and mind you, i have teach before ok..hello..encouragement please...
would you like it if you are looking for a job then having send your resume, i come up to you with this sorta remarks..awfully painful, right?
i may laugh..i may joke..i may act as if nothing wrong is said but i remember and i am hurting so please people..if you dont have anything nice to say, shut up..
for those have said such a thing to me and os feeling terribly bad now and is making a vow not to do so to me ever again, i forgave you..so, apologies accepted..
there you go..go on..smile!!!

ok..i am FB-ing alot..i have been scrolling and kay-po-ing people's profile..looking into one by one of their profile and pictures..oh..i obtained juicy juicy information through FB..hahaha..

finals is less than 2 weeks..and im happily goofing around, doing everything but study..how great is that?i am slacking and my notes..im not even gonna mention that..everything else is disorientated..

and lastly..i wanna declare something out i the open...

I AM NOT READY TO WORK YET !!!!!!!!!!